WALT DISNEY – THE FATHER OF MICKEY MOUSE

Walt Disney is one of the most famous animation filmmakers in the world. He is best known as the creator of Mickey Mouse – one of the most popular cartoon characters of all time.

Walt Disney was born on December 5, 1901, in Chicago, USA. As a child, he loved drawing and spent a lot of time sketching. He attended McKinley High School and also took art classes at night.

He started his career in animation and became successful in 1928 with the creation of Mickey Mouse. After that, he made many famous animated movies such as Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty. Besides making movies, he also built Disneyland – a magical theme park loved by children and adults.

Walt Disney was married and had two daughters. He passed away in 1966, but his legacy continues. Today, The Walt Disney Company is one of the biggest entertainment companies in the world, and millions of people still enjoy his creations.

1. Organization – 9/10

• Bố cục hợp lý: mở bài → childhood/education → career/achievements → family → death/legacy.
• Chuyển ý nhìn chung mượt, nhưng phần từ achievements sang theme park hơi đột ngột, có thể dùng Apart from films… để nối.

2. Legibility – 9.5/10

• Rõ ràng, câu ngắn gọn, dễ đọc.
• Trình bày sạch sẽ, có dấu câu hợp lý.
• Nên in nghiêng tên phim (Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty).

3. Ideas – 8/10

• Đầy đủ các ý cơ bản, nhưng nếu so với facts SGK thì:
• • SGK ghi Brenton Grammar School, không phải McKinley High School hay “took art classes at night”.
  • Chưa đề cập số lượng anh chị em, thông tin vợ (Lillian Bounds), hoặc giải thưởng (26 Oscars, 3 Golden Globes, 1 Emmy).
  • Thêm Cinderella và Sleeping Beauty là mở rộng ngoài facts SGK, nhưng hợp lý nếu không bị ràng buộc bởi yêu cầu bám SGK.
  • Không nhắc tới Disney World – một di sản quan trọng theo facts.

4. Word choice – 8.5/10

• Cách diễn đạt rõ ràng, dễ hiểu, nhưng đơn giản.
• Có thể nâng cấp:
• • famous animation filmmakers → world-renowned animation pioneer.
  • built Disneyland – a magical theme park loved by children and adults → founded Disneyland, a groundbreaking theme park that has enchanted generations of visitors.
  • his creations → his creative legacy.

5. Grammar use – 9/10

• Ngữ pháp nhìn chung tốt, chỉ lỗi nhỏ:
• 1. He is best known → nếu nói về người đã mất, nên dùng He was best known.
  2. spent a lot of time sketching → đúng, nhưng có thể dùng spent much of his time sketching để trang trọng hơn.
  3. Besides making movies → đúng, nhưng Apart from making films nghe học thuật hơn.

Điểm tổng

• Organization: 9/10
• Legibility: 9.5/10
• Ideas: 8/10
• Word choice: 8.5/10
• Grammar use: 9/10
  Tổng = 44/50 → Thang 10: ~8.8/10
  (Nếu yêu cầu bám facts SGK, Ideas chỉ ~7/10 → tổng ~8.4/10)

Bản nâng cấp bám facts SGK

Walt Disney was one of the most famous animation pioneers in the world. He was best known as the creator of Mickey Mouse – one of the most popular cartoon characters of all time.
Born in Chicago in 1901, Disney developed a love for drawing and painting at an early age. He attended Brenton Grammar School but left at the age of 16 to follow his dream of becoming an artist.
He created beloved characters such as Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck, and Goofy. His first full-length animated feature, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, was a groundbreaking success. Over his career, he won 26 Oscars, 3 Golden Globe Awards, and 1 Emmy Award — a record in film history. Apart from making films, he founded Disneyland and later conceived Disney World, world-famous theme parks that attract millions of visitors each year.
Disney had three older brothers and one younger sister. He married Lillian Bounds, and they had two daughters, one biological and one adopted.
He died in 1966 at the age of 65 from cancer. Today, The Walt Disney Studios continues to produce world-class films and inspire generations to follow their dreams.